the OTHER mother

How to Pose

This is how Carrie poses for a portrait.  We have several hundred pictures of her smiling with her eyes sealed shut.

High Five

I feel pretty great this week.

1. The Other Mother was mentioned on AfterEllen! Linda Villarosa also wrote about the book I'm in, Confessions of the Other Mother.  And she mentioned my friends Polly, Dana, and new acquaintance Sara.  What is AfterEllen? It's just the lesbian version of People magazine.  Huzzah.
   
2. I, slug, have exercised five of the past six days.  I realized, as I was walking around the neighborhood that first day that I haven't walked since we gave our dog Jake away. Maybe I was in mourning for the past 18 months. Maybe that's why it's been so hard to get myself moving.  A few blocks from our house, I saw a dog that looked like him and cried. But by the third day, thanks to the mighty miracle of endorphins, I adjusted. Now, ignited by an ipod shuffle, I am walking for myself. Or for Missy Elliot.  I'm not sure which.
3. Marcia gave me a cool watch for my birthday. It's practically art.
4. In Houston the sunshine is wondrous.
5. How much better could it get?  Well, thanks to Christine in the BBB community, I have discovered The Hockneyizer.

Listen Up

Move over, Bruce.  The new boss is here.

Best. Birthday. Weekend. Ever.

We've had a great time celebrating. Nana flew in for the weekend.  The girls had a ball with her, and Marcia and I went out for dinner on a Saturday night. I had time to work on my poems, work out at the gym, and even read a mystery. Sunday we all went to the beach. The gulf was so calm, it seemed almost lake-like. It was perfect for toddlers who can't swim but think that they can.

Pearl and Carrie made a poster-sized picture for me. Pearl's friend Alex called and sang happy birthday on our voice mail.  Have I mentioned that he calls me Baba too?  Sweet.

PING DAY

Hi Everyone! It's Marcia, and I invite you to celebrate PING DAY with us. Baba's birthday is today, so raise that cup of orange juice to the sky and say a toast for Robin. She's 45, and she makes yummy coconut tofu curry for us to eat and rattles off long Hebrew prayers on Friday nights and sings lullabies to the kids when they're fussy and irrational and doesn't mind swimming with big fish in the salty ocean and builds death-defying Lego contraptions in our den and remembers all the bizarre lyrics to the Talking Heads songs of her youth and likes to grow rosemary and oregano and cilantro on our back porch and loves the color orange and expertly manages millions of dollars (work's dinero, not ours, alas) and is good at changing light bulbs on tall ladders and spends evenings with a coloring book on her lap and knows how to do math problems in her head and reads mysteries in bed with a flashlight and plays online Babble most nights 'til midnight and likes really modern paintings, poetry, and toasters, and cusses with her eyebrows and knows how to fiddle around with the insides of a computer and wears really cute boxer shorts to bed and loves slippers even though we live in the tropics and takes approximately 17-63 photographs a day (and keeps them all) and gives shots to our diabetic cat every night and...are you getting the picture? This woman is big-time multi-talented, and I get to live and laugh with her every single day. We love you, Ping! Happy Happy Birthday to you. XO

Carrie at 1.8

Thanks for all your ideas about Carrie's beloved blankie. We followed your advice and the picture book Owen and from one we created two aqua blue blankies.  She loves them both, and we can wash one while the other one is "busy."

Carrie likes to assert herself by devising her own ways of doing things. She thinks trust games are cool and likes to fall backwards to see if anyone will catch her. This game is scariest at a swimming pool or on the beach. Carrie is an innovative chef who is not afraid to take risks in her recipes. This morning, for example, she concocted, "Green grapes and American cheese in a soy milk marinade."  She calls me Bobby instead of Baba. Don't tell her I told you this one, but she has been known to throw a tantrum when things don't go exactly her way.

Carrie is able to say simple sentences.  Some of her favorites are:

Mo mook peas.  (More milk, please.)

Play wit Pull.  (Yes, she still thinks her name is Pearl.)

I want it.  Mine!  (perfect enunciation on this one)

P.S. She gives wonderful hugs.

Pearl at 3.5

Pearl's love of storytelling continues to grow and evolve.  She gives her characters names such as "Jealousy" or "Phoebe 5-4-2," and the characters speak with special accents and intonations.  Each character is still a toy from her collection.  Often the setting is also a toy.  We have a barn, a garage, a race track, and airport.  Sometimes she builds the setting herself with blocks and tinker toys.  She says she wants to be a dinosaur for Halloween. In this photo, she's a triceratops.

Pearl is now 3.5 years old. Every day she asks, "Am I four yet?"

Family Resemblance

One part of my "other motherhood" experience has been that absolutely no one ever says, "Oh, she looks just like you." Certainly, throughout my childhood, people said that to my parents constantly. Well, thanks to my dear friend Terris, today that changed. She thinks Carrie and I look just alike! That really made my day!

Excuses

Sorry I haven't been posting as much as usual.  I've been a little down this week, probably because of a looming birthday.  It's hard to break these habits of feeling.  Feelings turn out to be a lot stronger than anyone thought.  It's like the scientific study that discovered that the material in a spider web is tougher than steal.  Who could have guessed that? I have been posting at Big Window, if you'd like to check out my Other blog. And I'm sure to bounce back soon.  Back-to-school is a demanding time of the year, isn't it?

Photo credit: Deborah Lattimore via Flickr

Panes That May Need Cleaning

Baba: Doesn't the light look beautiful in your room this afternoon?

Pearl: Well, I think the windows might have chicken splots.

Shirt Shots

Can you tell who's who?

Happy Jewish New Year

[photo credit: gabriel zagni, via flickr]

Question of the Day: Little Linus

Holy Attachment, Batman!

Does your kiddo have a security blanket or precious idol--I mean object--that she cannot live without?  What does one do when the rip in said object of affection grows and grows?  Are we in big trouble?

Baby Loves Disco

Does your tyke live to do the hustle?

Baby Loves Disco might be coming to your area soon.

Okay, it's absurd, but the proceeds go to charity. 

Who's game?  (You know you want to try it, right?)

Houston Cool 5

Another truly marvelous thing about Houston is that we have great Vietnamese restaurants. That might surprise you, but Houston has one of the largest Vietnamese communities in the United States. 

My favorites restaurants are Van Loc and Kim Son, and they serve up authentic dishes. For a funky twist on Vietnamese cooking, Jenny's Noodle House is always fun.

Click here to review the previous Houston Cool posts.

H E L L O

Carrie can talk.  Lately she's adding new words like crazy.  Her pronunciation is--shall we say--her own.  Here is a guide for those of you who want to talk like our girl.

beach = ahhhh beat

what's this? = waaaah deece?

chute = shoes

schnhack = snack

hell pearl = help me (she thinks she is Pearl?)

box = blocks

peanut butter = blaaah blah blaaah blah

Results of the Reader Survey

Thanks to everyone who responded to my informal Reader Survey last week.  I really appreciate your help. All of the responses were extremely positive and encouraging.  I appreciate your vote of confidence.  Here are a few suggestions that I gleaned from the response.  Let me know if these sound right to you.

• Write more about the problems and hard times.
• Write more about the process of parenting.
• Write more about Marcia and me.
• Consider changing the blue background color (on either side of the sidebars).

How do these ideas sound to you? 

High on Milestones

Pearl's last few days could be characterized by the phrase "leaps and bounds." She has made major playground progress.  She slid down "the shiny pole" at the park this weekend and managed half the monkey bars.  This coolest thing about this was that she announced before we left that she was now able to do these things.  Creative visualization?  Whatever you call it, she was correct.

Tuesday was Pearl's first day back at preschool.  She said it went "great."  She has returned to Montessori school and has the same teachers and some of the same classmates as last year, including her best friend Alex.  Below I've posted a picture that she made. She said that it's her.  And also a rocket ship.  And a dinosaur. Named Raiser.

Carrie has had her fair share in the milestone extravaganza. Tune in tomorrow to learn everything you want to know and more about: The Squirrel Bed.

Despite Excessive Precipitation

In Between Thunderstorms