My friend Nancy Ford sent me this video of Billy Collins reading his poem "The Lanyard." If you've ever been a parent, a child, a teacher, a summer camper, or some combination thereof-- this poem is a MUST.
If you watch it, let me know whether it makes you laugh or cry.
I *heart* rituals, and the bedtime story ritual is one of my favorites. I also like this book; have you read "And Tango Makes Three" yet? It's a true story about the two daddy penguins who had a baby in the Central Park Zoo.
Have I mentioned that Carrie is infatuated with horses lately? Her favorite request--and she wakes me up saying this in the middle of the night--is: "Baba, let's talk about horses!"
[Warning: Headline contains spoilers!] Pearl cried when Marcia left her in the kindergarten classroom this morning, and although I didn't ask, it seems somewhat possible that Marcia shed a tear herself. But when she picked Pearl up this afternoon, she was a happy student. She reported four (yes, four!) things that had happened in class and said her teacher "has some cool ideas." This is high praise, coming from Pearl.
Unfortunately Marcia had sad news for Pearl when they got home. One of her African Dwarf Frogs, Fred, had died. Because of who she is--and no doubt amplified by the anxiety du jour--Pearl was heartbroken and sobbed for over an hour. Eventually, though, Pearl helped clean the aquarium for Tad, who has always been the more exuberant of the two frogs. By the time I got home, a pizza party had started. Carrie had had a great day at her new preschool. They were ready to celebrate.
Marcia's word for today was "bittersweet," and it's fitting. One of the books we read tonight was Cynthia Rylant's Dog Heaven. Afterward Pearl imagined Frog Heaven, the new home of Fred the frog. One day, we'll all be there together, swimming.
Carrie: When I was a baby I killed a few times.
Baba: You did?
Carrie: Yeah, but I was a baby then.
Baba: How did you kill them?
Carrie: A gun
Baba: What did you kill, Carrie?
Carrie: Books. Because they didn't have horses in them.
Are you familiar with the Taro Gomi coloring books?
There's a series of them. This one, Doodles, is Pearl's first. Each page spread has an unfinished picture and the sentence at the top contains a suggestion of how the child might complete it. For example, the picture (below) asks that you give the girl a fabulous dress. The second one asks you to fill in the boy's talk bubble with the saddest possible sentiment. (Pearl has written, "I lost my puppy.") The third picture asks that you fill the tree with birds. I would have LOVED this kind of book when I was a kid.
Last week I started writing about how, in our family, we like to act out favorite books. Another fun way to help your preschoolers enjoy storytelling is through dictation. Dictation works well with young children because often their ability to tell a story far exceeds their ability to physically write it down.
To start, we usually offer: "If you'd like to make up story, I'd be happy to write it down." Often they refuse. We don't pressure them. When they are interested in storytelling, we get down on their level and set it up so they can see the paper. We write as they talk.
Carrie likes to hold set up plastic animals and she moves them around as the story develops. Don't worry if the story makes little sense or if the child makes mistakes, saying, for example, that a cow laid an egg. Corrections often stop the story. In order to encourage a young storyteller, it's important to listen and, during pauses, ask questions.
Here is an example of a poem that Pearl "wrote" last week. Marcia let her choose a picture from a catalog or magazine that she liked. Pearl chose the one she liked best and pasted where she wanted it on the paper--she chose the color too. Pearl told Marcia what to write.
The woman who can fly is very courageous. She shows people how brave she is by jumping off houseboats or ships. She soars through the air and is very courageous to be such a woman who can soar through the sky like a bird. Oh my, oh my, the woman who can fly!
by Pearl, age 5
Once the story is done, we read the story to the child, pointing to each word on the page. After each sentence we ask if we "got it right." Let your child know that she can make changes, if she wants.
At first the words your child tells you may not be stories at all. It's possible you will get a list or random observations. Don't worry. Later, when the dictation process develops into stories, you can even invite the kids to act them out!
** The ideas reflected here come from my work with the Rice University School Literacy and Culture Project.
Imaginative play is the favorite activity here in Grrrlville. It is even more popular than television (maybe because we have no cable or reception?!).
When Pearl and Carrie were toddlers they liked to "tell stories." At first they used plastic animals and human figures as characters. They would tell the stories, and we would all move our characters according to what they said. Papa Pig gives birth to baby T-Rex? No problem. Little girl celebrates her birthday inside of a tea cup with Alice? Sure.
Their favorite stories when they were young were:
We like to incorporate into the stories messages that our children might resist otherwise. Perhaps the mouse should try using his words before devouring that lion? It also gives us a chance to help them expand their vocabularies and knowledge without actually instructing. As we run from the ottoman to the door, our characters "dash" or "flee" or "gallop" or even "fly."
Now that they're older, Pearl and Carrie have graduated to "acts." We did not initiate the transition. Pearl started it, and of course Carrie followed close behind her. Many of these acts start with characters from books or movies that they know well. Instead of using the toy animals as the characters, they act out the parts.
A great way to start drama with your preschoolers is to offer them the chance to act out some favorite books. Let me warn you, however, that when it comes to acting, all books are not equal. Sometimes a favorite book is a real dud on the "stage." Our girls loved Time for Bed by Mem Fox when they were young, but it didn't work very well for acting because there's no plot.
This is how we do it. Read the book once. Ask "Who are the characters?" Once this is determined, reread the book. Then ask, "What character would you like to be?" Then reread the story pausing after each sentence or page so that your kids can act it out.
Here are a few books that have worked well for us:
Click, Clack, Moo: Cows That Type by Doreen Cronin
Buster by Denise Fleming
Amazing Grace by Mary Hoffman
Whistle for Willie by Ezra Jack Keats
Where the Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak
For younger children or children who are hesitant about this kind of play, some good books might include:
From Head to Toe by Eric Carle
My Many Colored Days by Dr. Seuss
Here are a few guidelines that have worked well for us:
* no props or costumes unless they're made by your child
* let your child be the director and ask him/her where to stand and what to do
* instead of making suggestions, model
* no corrections from the parent, unless safety is involved
I learned the core elements of this activity from my work with Rice University's School Literacy and Culture Project. If you're interested in the pedagogy, it comes from books by Patsy Cooper and Vivian Paley.
Your feedback is welcome!
[illustrations are from Whistle for Willie by Ezra Jack Keats
Favorite object = blue blankie
Favorite book = buster by denise fleming
Favorite animal = puppy
Career aspiration = super hero
As many of you know, I’m in a bit of a funk lately. According to Marcia, this means that our
state is in a red zone. This includes,
but is by no means limited to, the following four areas:
1)
the state of my hair
2)
the state of our laundry
3)
the state of the refrigerator
4)
the state of my wallet
It also means that bad luck seems to follow me (and my
hair), even when I leave the state we call home. For example, today at work the rear tire on
my Subaru spontaneously exploded. And
then our mechanic said he wouldn’t be able to work on it for a few days because
he just broke his finger!
Anyway, back to the point.
When I am in a funk, I don’t like to read nonfiction books. I’d rather play Scrabble or eat Ben &
Jerry’s Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ice Cream or crack open a Swedish mystery
novel.
So, when we got our puppy Cody, Marcia took it upon herself
to read several doggie books for us.
They ranged from beautiful personal stories by authors we know (Mark
Doty’s Dog Years) to old favorites
that have been updated (The Monks of New
Skete: Divine Canine) to new ones that our trainer recommended (Patricia
McConnell’s The Other End of the Leash).
Although Marcia left these books sprawled about in opportune locations such as my bedside table, my desk, and the bathroom magazine
rack, she eventually realized that I had not touched them.
So, Marcia did what anyone with a Partner-in-Funk would do:
she grabbed her highlighter and went to town.
Yes, she actually marked in pink and yellow for me every important
passage I need to read in The Other End
of the Leash to make life with Cody happy and pleasurable. Then she plopped the book on my lap.
One of the sections that Marcia (and through her, I) found
particularly interesting deals with a human’s need for ventral-to-ventral
contact. McConnell argues that humans
find tremendous pleasure in relating chest-to-chest. Like our primate relatives, we also enjoy
holding hands, kissing, and snuggling. The writer explains that this need for touch in us is powerful—it can actually
lower our heat rate and blood pressure.
She says that young girls are particularly fond of hugging
things to their chests— dolls, dogs, you name it—and so far, we are finding
this to be SO true. Pearl and Carrie
constantly fling their arms around Cody’s neck to hug him—tightly, furiously,
as if he is their younger brother preparing to head off to boarding school or some foreign war.
The problem, according to McConnell, is that dogs really don’t like to be
hugged. Many don’t even like the way we
pet them. She even argues that some dogs don’t obey the “come” command because
they don’t want to be patted on the head!
Since reading (the highlighted passages of) this book and
studying Cody’s responses to us, I’ve become much more aware of his body
language and ours. I’m learning to
temper some of my natural tendencies and think about Cody from a canine’s
perspective.
I’m even learning a little
about myself. Cody reminds me to enjoy each breeze, try new foods, and sleep with abandon. Have your dogs (or other pets) taught you anything important?
Take this quiz to find out. And don't forget to share your answer.
I was tagged by Christine Martell and feel obligated to reveal to you today seven things you really don't need to know about me. Where shall we begin?
I have absurdly narrow feet. For me, buying shoes has never been a bit of fun.
I have balance issues. I can't ice skate or roller blade. In yoga, my standing tree pose almost always is accompanied by a loud "timber"!
I never sleep enough.
I steal things. These green numbers, for instance, are stolen from Christine Martell. Nice numbers, yes? I do not steal tangible things. I've never shoplifted. But I often swipe beautiful jpegs on the world wide web. My blog Big Window is the living proof.
The year after I finished my MFA, I read all of Jack Kerouac's books. This year I appear to be rereading them.
I like coloring in coloring books. Always have. My favorite of the kids' coloring books are here and here.
One day I hope to live on a beach, even if it's just for a month or two.
&&&
And now, to complete this meme, I must tag 7 other bloggers. The lucky winners are:
What's the best book you've read this summer?
Or, if that question doesn't work for you: what's the best book you'd like to read this summer?
Every month I update the listings of Pearl and Carrie's favorite books in the sidebar. Shifting gears a bit, here are MY favorite picture books of the month (and I'm choosing these books for the artwork more than for the stories):
ABC's by Charley Harper
Gwango's Lonesome Trail
The Octonauts and the Sea of Shade
If you have a favorite illustrator this month, please let us know.
Storytelling is one of those primal experiences, and I think that by trying out both the telling and listening roles, children get an early introduction to literature that is powerful and memorable. I mentioned Pearl's adventures in bookmaking last month, and my friend Doodaddy kindly asked for a peak at one of them. So I set up a photo album so that you can see a sample six-page tale. The writing is done by dictation, although Pearl did write her name and "The End." When we shared this book with Pearl's cousin Maya, she (Maya) immediately wrote and illustrated one herself. It was really good too!
It's that time of year again. We're gearing up for summer vacation. I wonder if you have some book suggestions for us. I'll give you a few topics on each of our minds. Pearl and Carrie's recent favorites are listed in the right-hand column.
Carrie: animals, sisters and brothers, books like LIttle Quack, Mama Cat, and Five Little Monkeys
Pearl:dogs, dogs, dogs
Marcia: quirky literary nonfiction, documentary films, ice cream trucks, and cultural studies
Robin: European murder mysteries, Haruki Murakami, stories involving Los Angeles, well-written lesbian fiction, and experimental poetry
Your suggestions are welcome.
[photo by Daniel Lestarjette via flickr]
This week Pearl and Carrie have been making books. "Booklets" might be a better term since the shortest ones are only four pages long, but they've been having fun with the endeavor. So far all of the books borrow characters from books they already know. They do make some modifications in the plots, however. Pearl's stories are much more "plotted" than Carrie's, as these two titles suggest. My favorite so far is called "Cera's Grumpy Day," based on the Land Before Time video series.
In no particular order...
1) Nana flew home Saturday after two weeks with us. We have been campaigning to get Nana and Papa to move to Htown. No such luck, so far. Your strategy suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
2) We planted herbs, beans, and marigolds in pots on our back porch.
3) My friend Faith died three weeks ago, while battling cancer, chemo, etc. for the second time. It seems unreal. Death seems unreal, doesn't it?
4) I submitted a chapbook manuscript to a poetry contest. Although the poems are not new, I'd never combined them in a sequence together. I don't remember ever submitting a chapbook for publication before either.
5) Carrie is making major progress, both in her speech and in her potty training. Hurray for Carrie!
6) I want a puppy. Pearl wants a puppy. But keeping in mind what happened with Jake, I think we're going to wait until Carrie is a little older.
7) Marcia and I got to hear the author of Persepolis, Marjane Satrapi speak. She is brave and funny and smart, a wonderful storyteller.
8) I may become addicted to lettuce wraps this summer.
9) Marcia knows a whole lot about ice cream trucks.
10) Let me know if you want to play Scrabulous on Facebook. I'm very addicted to it.
But (more than) enough about me...what's new with you?
Congrats to Kathy Belge and Gina Daggett on the publication of their new book, Lipstick and Dipstick: The Essential Guide to Lesbian Relationships. It hit the shelves last week.
You may know the butch/femme duo through their popular column in Curve Magazine or their blog. Is this book on your wish list?
Here's one of my habits. I wonder if it's weird or if others share it. When I'm traveling, I always like to read books set in or about the places I visit.
Nearly a dozen years ago I spent a month traveling around Italy with my friend Amy. We both read the book Italian Days by Barbara Grizzuti Harrison, passing it back and forth as we burned holes in our rail passes. 
Because Amy and I are both writers, we are pretty clear, usually, about the craft of writing, i.e. the difference between the narrator of the book and the person who wrote it. Nevertheless, by the end of the trip, it felt a bit like three of us were touring. We'd say things like, I agree with Barbara's comments about Venetian architecture, but I think your description of the squid cooked in its own ink captures what I experienced.
For me, reading literature is an experience that deepens my sense of the place.
On the trip to Los Angeles this past week, I read Ask the Dusk by John Fante. It's a novel that 
had a big impact on the beat generation. As far as I know, it doesn't have a big following in literary circles. I didn't realize it until I starting searching for an image for this post, but apparently it was made into a movie last year. The stars are Salma Hayek, Colin Farrel, and Donald Sutherland. Did you happen to see it? It seems to have received only so-so ratings. The book leaves you ragged. I'm not totally sure why I liked it even. The racism of the characters is disturbing. But something about it was good. Maybe it's that I have a weakness for books about writers.
I also read some nonfiction: City of Quartz by Mike Davis and Washed Up by Skye Moody. Both books have a curious tone to them, but I think once I started reading fiction, I really wanted more, more, more of the same.
Your turn, dear reader.
Today I am fishing for book recommendations. We have a nice collection of fictional picture books for Pearl and Carrie. Our collection leans toward imaginary adventures and talking animals. We'd like to add some books for the summer that are either nonfiction or simply more realistic stories. But they should be beautiful and well written, of course!
Pearl (age 3) likes dinosaurs, cars, trains, storytelling, and nature. Carrie (age 1.5) likes babies, animals, and life-skills such as cooking, cleaning, getting dressed, and gardening.
Three books that we already own that illustrate
what I have in mind might be Flotsam by David Wiesner or Planting a Rainbow by Lois Ehlert or The Paperboy by Dav Pilkey. If you have suggestions for our summer reading list, please let us know.
Tonight I picked up Chinese food on the way home from work. We've been reading Dim Sum for Everyone by Grace Lin, a book suggested to us by our friend Tae. Pearl and Carrie decided to give the chopsticks a try. They ate and laughed and laughed some more. It was a fun meal.
This weekend Marcia worked both Saturday and Sunday. Pearl, Carrie, and Baba did many outdoor activities. We played in parks, went to a farmer's market, took walks, and played in the sprinkler in the backyard. It's cool that the girls can play
together more now. They
really crack each other
up. Of course they also already make each
other furious, but much of the time they seem to be allies.
Do you remember in May when an essay I wrote was published in a book by Beacon Press? It's called Confessions of the Other Mother: Nonbiological Lesbian Moms Tell All, edited by Harlyn Aizley. Well, that book was nominated for a Lambda Literary Award. But even better than that, it is a finalist.
The Awards Ceremony will be on May 31st in NYC. You can see the complete list of finalists here.
Yes, friends, crazy Jojo (Carrie) can sit and twist and shout. She is a tiny, human tumbleweed, rolling across the prairie of our lives. And oh, what a screamer!Is there a book (or song or video) that your kid loves that you hate?
My least favorite books that we own are the Barney books. I don't how or know why we have them in the house! Hand-me-downs, most likely. In my spare time (ha ha), I plan to confiscate them!
A close friend of mine once told me that Barney (the TV version) was the best form of birth control ever invented. However the effectiveness of this method is apparently short-lived because a year after she told me that, her husband got a vasectomy.
As the world turns....
Amazon.com is still showing Confessions of the Other Mother, the new book that my essay's published in, as "soon to be released." Here are a few places that appear to be selling it right now: Two Lives, Rainbow Books, and UUA.
To see the previous post about this book, edited by Harlyn Aizley, click here.
Have you heard about Moms Rising yet? MomsRising.org is a new online grassroots movement to harness mom power, and you can join for free by hopping over to their website. Here some of from their introduction:
What would most moms like for Mothers Day? Not flowers, or a
necklace or even a new picture to hang on the fridge. What moms
really want are the policies and programs that would help families --
things like paid family leave, flexible work options, subsidized
childcare, and adequate healthcare. Our nation simply doesn’t
have policies and programs in place to support mothers and families – but
now moms can do something about it by logging on to
www.momsrising.org and signing up.
MomsRising co-founders Joan Blades (co-founder of MoveOn.org) and Kristin
Rowe-Finkbeiner co-authored a newly released book, The Motherhood
Manifesto, which features stories of dozens of mothers with diverse
experiences, and details the MomsRising agenda. It will be published on the website, one chapter at a time.
To summarize, MomsRising gives people a voice in the motherhood and family issues that are shaping our lives. Selah!
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